I ended 2024 in a solo retreat.

I had been so excited; this was the very first time I could do this since I got married and had kids. My discipler for the longest time (and cousin and best friend) had been encouraging me to go on a solo retreat, but I haven’t been able to because of, well, life. I don’t think I have to emphasize how three young children can take up so much (or all of?) of a mom’s time. But this year, I randomly asked my supportive husband, “Can I take a day off to have a coffee date with Jesus while you’re on break from work?”

To which, he responded, “Why just a coffee date? Have an overnight date with Jesus. Check into a hotel and get some rest.” Needless to say, I cried.

Checking nearby hotels, I decided to go to Asbury Hotel in Asbury Park, New Jersey. We love the area,  and though the boardwalk is closed for the winter, we thought he and the kids could pick me up the next day and eat out. I decided to go on December 30^th, and

I only had a week to prepare, so I frantically asked myself, “What do I do?” I literally just wanted to pray and read a book so with approximately 20 hours free, I don’t know what else to do.

My discipler, ate Janice, called me and told me not to create a packed schedule—I guess she knows me too well—and just really spend this time in prayer. So here are the four things I did in my first solo retreat:

Worship

Thankfully, I was armed with A LOT of worship playlists– my own, my discipler’s, and my Bible study group’s. It was the first thing I did after putting down my bag and books. I played worship music, closed my eyes, and raised my hands even, as I looked out the window and saw the ocean from a distance.

There is something very calming in doing this. While I worship at home whenever I can, it was the first time in a long time that I was able to do so without stopping the tears from falling down my cheeks.

Pray

In the Notes app on my phone, I have a list of things I pray for. I do this because oftentimes I forget. So I went through every item, taking the time to really think and say what I want to say. Every prayer intention was mentioned, every single thing in my life I gave thanks, every weakness and fear I offered to Him.

And then, I stayed quiet, and believed that God was there in the silence.

Journal

By the time I finished, It was already dark, so I decided to eat my dinner (a takeout of my favorite bulgogi rice bowl that I got from Mogu Asbury Park). It was my comfort food, something I really liked, so I enjoyed every bite and thanked the Lord that I could buy it despite not having a fixed income.

Then, armed with my notebook and pen, I explored the hotel and found a spot by the lobby where I could write.

I wrote down my dreams and what I want to achieve in the coming year. No filters, I just put everything on paper: what I want to feel, what I want for my kids, what I want for my marriage, and my career. I wrote down that I wanted to write for Jesus, and that 2025 is the year I will take it seriously. After pouring everything out in almost half of the notebook (it’s a very slim notebook!), I read everything I wrote– and it felt good.

Rest

It was already midnight when I returned to the room, so I did another thing I love to do: sleep. I played a podcast of Vous Church, said my night prayers and slept on the comfortable bed I had all to myself. 🙂

I did nothing groundbreaking or spectacular, but I achieved what I came for: I reconnected with the Lord and myself, and recharged. I did everything again the next morning, and by the time Warren and the kids came during check-out, I felt refreshed, filled, and ready to pour from a full cup.

And I promised myself that this gift is something I’ll give myself every year.